For a few weeks out of Addison's life she was napping. I was laying her in my bed and it was working for us. Well it stopped. It was getting to where it was taking 20 or 30 minutes to get her to sleep and then she was waking up about 30-40 minutes later and I had to go back in there for another 20 minutes to get her to go to sleep. I couldn't go outside with Titus or do much of anything because any noise was waking her up and I didn't want to leave her on my bed unsuperovised. So yesterday I decided enough was enough. She was going to start napping in her bed like a big girl. She cried for a few minutes but went to sleep, slept 30 minutes, and woke up crying. And the crying went on and on. Every 15 minutes or so I would go in there and lay her back down and say, "Night Night." or "You're ok, go to sleep." and walk out. After an hour and half, she fell asleep for about 10 minutes and woke up crying. By then it was after 4 so I was done trying. And then it happened the same today. (Actually it's still going on...) She woke up almost exactly 30 minutes after falling asleep and will NOT go back to sleep! It's so emotionally draining for me. I have been dealing with this for 18 months and I'm so tired of it. I've read books, talked to people, talked to doctors, and prayed. Nothing works. It is so hard for me to listen to her cry. I know she is a big girl and it isn't hurting her but she gets so worked up and after about an hour, I start to cry myself. I was such a happy mom when she started taking a nap for the first time. I felt like my prayers had been answered.
During the time that she is crying I start to get that "Why me" feeling and I go through so many emotions. I feel like I'm being ridiculous because there are some people that can't have kids or whose kids have cancer and they would love to have my problem. And I remind myself that God doesn't give us any more than we can handle and I tell God I wish he didn't think I could handle so much. I feel helpless, frustrated, unsure, and all of the above. I have read of some kids being like this on the Internet but never talked to another mom who understood what I was going through. As much as I love my husband, he is zero help in this department. And he doesn't understand how hard this is for me because it doesn't bother him to listen to her cry in the way that it bothers me. She wakes up around 6 every day and acts so tired a few hours later but if I let her take her cat nap then, she doesn't take another nap and then she is crabby all afternoon. It's like she does need sleep but she refuses to do it. Addison needs a nap time for herself and well being, but I also need it. I take a shower with her crying the entire time at the glass door almost every day because no matter what time I do it or what I bring into the bathroom for her, she usually just cries. I often wonder what it's like for the moms that tell me they do it before the child wakes up or during nap time.
I wanna have another baby really bad. I might even want two more. But I'm scared that I'll have another child that doesn't nap. I love Addison with all of my heart and if she never learned to take a nap in her own bed I wouldn't trade her for anything. But I don't want to go through this again.
Forgive me for the Woe is Me blog...but I'm just having a bad day and I needed to vent. Figured I would share while I listened to her cry.
Jennifer you HAVE to vent these feelings or you will really be a mess!
ReplyDeleteI am not in the situation so I really really hate to give advice about it, but I feel if I was in the the situation I would probably let her just cry it out no matter HOW long it takes! I kind of think the only way to break her of feeling like she HAS to either a.) have you there or b.) not nap is just to be consistant and show her that you are NOT putting up with it! I am learning that I am hving to break Camden of some things and although it is hard I know the MOST important thing is staying consistant and reminding him that I am boss! Good luck and stay strong!
I think it really is harder on the woman to hear her babies crying. We've gone through alot of issues with Hannah and sleeping. It took her 10 months to sleep through the night! And I hated letting her cry it out. I would just sit there on edge the whole time, while Josh could just watch tv and not care at all.
ReplyDeleteI'm not really in your shoes, so I don't know exactly how it is. But one thing that helped us with nap time, is that I would read them a story and then put them right in bed. That way it kinda got them used to a routine of knowing that it was naptime.
Hoping it gets better for you!
I do not have a lot of answers for this but there is one suggestion that I can share with you. We use a white noise machine for Chase while he sleeps. It has been awesome! He is a LIGHT sleeper so this really helps him go into a deeper sleep and he does not hear the cars outside, the phone ringing, the dogs outside..etc. We bought at a luggage store in the mall. It was about $ 40 or $ 50 but worth every penny ten times over. I will be buying another one with the new baby.
ReplyDeleteI really really hope things get better with nap time. I can only imagine how much this stresses you out!
Stay strong. I've never had the nap problem, but with other problems I've dealt with, consistency is key. Maybe you need some ear plugs to help with the crying. :) Keep up the great mothering you're doing!
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