Coping with school and preparing myself for the future

The first week was rough, but not nearly as bad as it could have been I guess. Addison cried every day for a couple of weeks when she started. She would scream as Nathan dragged her out of the house and cry when he left. She was also dealing with me being put on bed rest so it was a lot to take on at 2. However, when she was done crying at school she didn't cry any more during the day. Weston had harder time at first because he would cry off and on throughout the day, but drop offs weren't as dramatic. I think I struggled more than him. One day last week I was 20 minutes early to pick him up. So I just sat in my car waiting...counting the minutes. I didn't enjoy my time away because I was so worried about him.

This week has been much better. Little tears at drop off but not during the day. I think he cried on Monday for a minute because he got to see Addison during exercise time so when it was time for them to leave his teacher said he cried for her. I love that they let them see each other at times. Friday is chapel day so when they went to chapel Addison came and sat with him. Both Nathan and I wish we could hide and watch them at school one day.

Last week Weston starting taking a tractor to school. It was his coping toy. Other kids have pacifiers or things they have brought but I wanted to avoid security things because his stay in his bed. Didn't want to break those rules if we didn't have to. Well he found comfort in bringing a toy tractor. (Nathan couldn't deny this child if he wanted to! haha) After a few days I switched it to a "gator" because the tractor made noise so I thought it would be better. Weston LOVES his backpack! He began to love it more and more to the point that he didn't want to take it off. ALL DAY. So he would wear his backpack all day long. Then pitch a fit when I made him take it off to get in his seat. It cracked us up. I love that his teachers are being so accommodating with him as he transitions. I've been working with him this week about having him take it off when he gets to his class. So today when he was asking for his tractor, I told him he could have it in class when we took off his backpack.

This morning we had our best drop off ever! We walked into class and he started to fuss a second and reach for me and I told him lets take off your backpack and get your tractor. He didn't say word when I took it off. Then a little girl ran up to him so excited! She was saying hi to him and he gave her the biggest smile. He looked at me, pointed his finger and said hi. (as if to tell me she said hi) We talked to her and I asked the teacher her name. Riley. Weston said "Hi. Friend." ... Remember how I told you his eyes sparkled?? Yeah, well he turned those diamonds up a notch when she was talking to him. He kept looking at me with a shy, happy grin and smiling. I walked out of the class room knowing I was in trouble. At first I thought it was so cute and I loved that for the first time his teacher didn't have to come hold him, he saw me walk out the door and didn't cry. (yay!!)

As I started driving I thought...
"Wait a minute! That's MY boy!!" I started realizing that one day, perhaps a while from now but not as long as I would like, a pretty girl will come into my son's life and with a "Hi" steal his heart and suddenly I will be taking a back seat. *tears* I honestly resisted the urge to call my mother in law this morning and ask her how it made her feel. It just hit me hard. Not to say I was crying or anything like that, but I was just thinking about it as if it never occurred to me. Thank goodness I have a while because I'm going to need time to prepare...